In a better world, my manager would hire a clown to keep me from becoming bored.

Clowns in the workplace aren’t as funny as you might think. Try the internet instead.

In a better world, my manager would hire a monkey to keep me from getting bored.

In a better world, your manager would hire a little monkey jockey to ride on your back and make you work faster.

Hey, my manager reads this site. Don't give him ideas. He means a masseuse, bossman!

4: I'll see what I can do.

Wouldn't a clown anaethesiologist be a better hire than just a clown?

What does the clown do that is an improvement on all the people making faces and tapping on the glass?

I be totally down with getting anaesthesia at work, but I'm not optimistic about its effects on my productivity.

Now that I think about it, a monkey anaesthesiologist would be more entertaining, but perhaps a bigger gamble overall.

Or hire a haiku writing duck.....Some of those were pretty good...

our solar system is likely to get banished way out to the dark galactic boondocks.

Nonsense. If computer models can't predict the weather next week, how can they possibly forecast what happens with our glaxy, much less our solar system, in a couple billion years?

Besides, God if created the Earth and universe only 6000 years ago, He's likely to bring it all to a stop for a Last Judgment before then, and Heaven and Hell are not in this universe - unless of course you're Mitch Romney or one of his ilk.