January 06, 2005

Warning.

Posted by apostropher

Via Fark, I see that Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch has released their winners for this year's most ridiculous product warning disclaimers. Starting with the runners-up:

  • A scooter with the warning "This product moves when used."
  • A digital thermometer with the advice "Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally."
  • An electric blender used for chopping and dicing that reminds users to "Never remove food or other items from the blades while the product is operating."
  • A three-inch bag of air used for packaging that read "Do not use this product as a toy, pillow, or flotation device."

Congratulations to all the contestants. You're all winners in my book. Now, for our grand prize winner...

  • A toilet brush with a tag that says "Do not use for personal hygiene."

But, but, how else am I going to get the middle of my back clean? That's not silly, that's just counter-logical. The thermometer is demanding a recount.

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Comments
1

I was gonna make a joke about sterilising the thermometer in boiling water, but then I remembered we don't have mercury thermometers anymore. Will boiling the tip wreck a digital thermometer?

Can I borrow your thremometer?

Mercury is fun to play with, passing from hand to hand. Yes, I have actually done this as a lad. Yes, that explains it.

Posted by: Tripp at January 6, 2005 02:34 PM
2

Wow, so we can publicly admit that we read fark now?

/me is still scared of anyone finding out

Posted by: Andrew Cholakian at January 6, 2005 08:16 PM
3

Oh, I loves me some Fark.

Posted by: apostropher at January 6, 2005 08:19 PM
4

I think the toilet brush was that new Clorox one. Can you just imagine, bleaching that part of your body????

Posted by: Morrigan at January 6, 2005 08:39 PM
5

Some dope probably tried to remove food from moving blades and whacked his fingers off. Then he sued the company that manufactured the appliance. The language for product warnings is often a result of such incidents. There are more dumb people out there than we realize.

Posted by: Donna at January 8, 2005 07:15 PM
6

Morrigan,

Well, yeah. Crest wants to charge me $27 to bleach my teeth! Maybe the toilet brush would be cheaper.

Posted by: Tripp at January 10, 2005 12:17 PM
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