Well, if Larry Flynt can run for governor...

Zack Medford is a 20-year-old junior at North Carolina State University who is running for a seat on the Raleigh City Council. There is still some doubt as to whether he is actually allowed to run, since the state constitution requires candidates to be 21, and the Wake County elections board has said no. Medford holds that since he turns 21 on October 7th, prior to the December swearing in date, that shouldn't be an issue.

But that's not his biggest problem at this point. Medford was a columnist for the NCSU student newspaper, and maintained a (now defunct) personal, um, "humor" website. And the News and Observer runs down a few of the "humorous" items.

Explicit descriptions of 33 hard-core sex acts, many of which harm and demean women. The list describes punching women in the face, nose or back of the head during sex; defecating on them; or "ramming" a woman's head against a wall. [...] A diary of his 2002 spring break trip that describes meeting four women at the beach. He says when one woman ignored him, he wanted to fill her mouth with sand and urinate on her. [...] An advice column that describes breaking up with a past girlfriend by having someone douse her with vodka then throw a lit match in her hair. He wrote that he "laughed heartily" while urging a transvestite to urinate on the woman to put the fire out.

"You have to look at this, basically, through the view of college students," the article quotes him as explaining, amid a torrent of backpedaling and apologies. Umm, yeah, you do, I suppose, particularly since his campaign platform seems mostly predicated on having Raleigh police lay off of breaking up college parties. Unfortunately for Medford, the website also contained "descriptions of drunken antics," which, given his not-yet-legal-to-drink status are problematic. Now, I think the 21 year drinking age is absurd and counter-productive, and I frankly believe that everybody should be able to put whatever - or whoever - they wish into their bodies. But:

Medford, a member of the city's Substance Abuse Advisory Commission, does advise students to drink responsibly. He acknowledged that, though underage, he has been a drinker. He said that he could not recall whether he has consumed alcohol since being appointed by council members to the substance abuse board July 1.

He can't remember? Puh-leeze. He would sound less guilty just admitting it. To be fair, this all paints him as no different from 80% of the students on any college campus to the left of Bob Jones University. And none of it should be disqualifying. But I suspect this isn't going to be his year, all the same. It's just too easy to ridicule.

The lesson in all of this? The internet has a long, long memory. I'm pretty certain apostropher.com has already scuttled my future Supreme Court nomination by the inevitable Olsen Twin co-presidency (and yes, those pictures make me feel dirty and ashamed, but DAMN!). On a related note, this week I had my first ever experience of seeing a porn ad page on the internet, and realizing, "Hey, wait a minute... I KNOW HER."