Crikey.

Somebody's been at sea a little too long.

Australian sailors had sex on the beach, streaked through military buses and pranced naked with rolled-up burning paper stuck between their buttocks in a wild, drunken romp at a US outpost in the Indian Ocean. An investigation by The Weekend Australian has revealed many other complaints of misconduct during the 24-hour shore leave on Diego Garcia – the US base dubbed "Gilligan's Island with guns." Among the allegations were widespread drunkenness among the crews of HMAS Adelaide and HMAS Kanimbla, urinating in public, overt public male-to-male kissing and abuse of foreign military personnel.

Disciplinary action has been taken against just two sailors – one for the so-called "dance of the flamers," where rolled paper inserted between the buttocks was set alight, and another for exposing himself in public. [...] Another drunken shipmate had run naked through an army shuttle bus transporting other foreign military personnel. His identify could not be established.

They never identify the "foreign military personnel," either the ones that were abused or the ones that got the naked, hammered Aussie come barreling through their bus. Or if they're the same bunch and this guy was verbally abusing them as he ran through their bus. It doesn't really seem out of the realm of possibility.

The Dance of the Flamers was performed at a yacht club.
(link via People's Republic of Seabrook)